Today I'm writing about something that's been on my mind for quite a while, so I decided to put it into words. I'm not much of a writer — I'm more of a talker (those who know me can confirm) — but this one I decided to write down.
I recently started listening to a business mentor every day, and she said something that really struck a chord with me. People often follow ten different mentors/coaches/educators at once — and just keep spinning in place.
Why?
Because each of them works differently and gives different advice. So we do a little of what one says, then a little of what another says, then a bit of a third — and eventually we give up because we see no results. (At least not the ones we expected.)
We're moving fast, but getting nowhere. That's why there's a hamster in the picture — he runs fast too, without moving an inch.
She was speaking from a business development perspective; I'll write about nutrition, because this happens all the time in my field as well.
These days we're flooded with mentors for every aspect of life, and it's really hard to decide who to listen to. So we listen to everyone. What surprised me is that people often take advice from someone who's in the exact same place they are — or in an even worse position.
A real-life example: a woman I know is frequently on diets, and her weight fluctuates accordingly. She's slim for a while, then chubby for a while, and she's been going around in that circle for years. She doesn't follow any specific diet — she sticks to the classic one: eat almost nothing until the weight comes off, and once she reaches her goal weight, go back to her old habits. That part doesn't surprise me, because a lot of people function that way — I've been in that position myself.
What did surprise me in this whole story is that this person went to ask for nutrition advice from someone who was morbidly obese. And she actually listened!!!
Of course, that person's advice didn't exactly hold up, so she quickly went back to doing things her own way. And let me just add — she knows I'm a nutritionist and that she can always come to me, but she has never once asked me for advice.
Another example from my practice: for several years now, one person has been asking me for advice on how to lose weight. For years, I've been telling her the same thing. She still hasn't taken any action — she just keeps looking for more advice. Last time, she even commented that there are so many nutritionists with so many different opinions that she forgets what she's been told.
I don't know what advice other nutritionists give, and honestly, I'm not interested. I work the way I believe is best — the way I wish someone had worked with me when I needed help. Others, I assume, work the way they believe is best.
What I do know is this: if we listen to everyone, we won't get far. Everyone has their own way of working that they consider the best — and for them, it is. But what makes it effective is sticking to it and doing the work consistently, their way. Because that's the catch: you have to do the work.
How do you choose who to listen to? That's something we each have to decide for ourselves.
For example, the mentor I've been listening to is someone I've followed for several years — but only recently did I start to truly hear her.
Like I said, writing isn't really my thing, I prefer talking… maybe I should start a podcast?